Reflections on this space

I have been very much mia again. Somehow this year just flew by and I got a list of excuses as to why I didn't post more on the blog or on social media, but let me not bore you. I am re-evaluating my photography work and with that all my creative endeavors. I have been reflecting a lot on my current work situation lately and realized that I have been going in a direction that I am not really interested in. I keep asking myself: why be a freelancer and end up doing projects that I find not creatively fulfilling? I am taking December off to decide what I would like to do next. I have a vague idea but need to set proper outlines and also to just see what emerges when I just take photos for joy. I have kept up with the 365 photo project, I am posting the photos on my personal IG. I am really enjoying it actually. It's very fluid and kinda just whatever catches my eye, a lot of the time they just snap taken on my phone. Yet I am really happy with it and I am thinking of printing them all and making a little book for myself at the end of it. It has become a space for me to just follow creative whims at times and that has been quite invigorating but also eye-opening. I still love photography very much, but somehow I feel like I might kill my own creative drive by setting limits and definitions for myself. I find that I still am trying to fit a niche half the time. The worst part for me personally however is that I suddenly realized that I have put myself into a niche professionally that doesn't really suit me. Now I have the luxury that I can just step away and redefine things as my husband is covering rent and food for me. Which is why I am going to do exactly that. Talking about niches I still find it really hard to answer the question: So what do you do?It's simply not so clear-cut. I tend to answer that I am a freelance photographer these days. But then when the conversation goes on people realize that I also studied chemistry, did counseling, was a teacher, an artisan.. quite a few different things. I still think it sounds like I am a bit of a flake. So I try to limit the exposure of my illustrious jack-of-all-trades CV. I basically niche myself with each person differently. It's something I have for some reason always done, quite unconsciously actually. This results in me having a very diverse social circle, something I actually really cherish. It means I am challenged to grow and see many different angles of life. I always had many diverse interests. I was the chemistry student who made paper mache bowls during her downtime. While I was working in refugee camps I took up embroidery and when I worked as a jewelry designer I ended up making porcelain bowls on the side. I find that I do my best work when I do several different things at one time. Like if I study a lot, I do something creatively that allows my mind to wander or if I am socializing a lot, I do something that needs my attention and solitude. Most of my creative endeavors end up overlapping and becoming a multimedium kind of a thing. Looking at my creative history I find that I always looked to combine my passions, like bringing my creative life together into one project. I keep feeling like I fail utterly at this endeavor. I know I said this before, but I am back to thinking: I am my niche. Long story short, I will be posting more about my creative endeavors. Whatever they are. I decided that one of my goals for the next year is to follow and share my passions. So this will space will be more of a what inspires me, my passions and interests kind of blog. What might that encompass you ask?Well the things that inspire me are traveling, nature, and the beauty of this world.My passions are history, food, all things artisan, books, fountain pens, and exploring.

The thing about… Lemon Juicers

Let me start by explaining that I am a kinda minimalist when it comes to possessions. Why kinda, you might wonder. Well, I don't want too much stuff however, I do make an exception when it comes to tools and books. Tools to me are artisanal tools from fountain pens to knitting needles to a gnocchi board and all other creative tools in-between. And I honestly don't think one can have too many books. Any kind of books, notebooks included. But I digress. My brand of minimalism is that I don't have 2 or 3 of the same /similar things. I basically (try to) only buy an item I need or I will use and I get the best quality I can. This is my philosophy on all things I buy, be that clothes or household things even when it comes to tools. I rather wait a little while and get the perfect (for me) item, than get one that is cheap or not quite what I want. My husband has a different philosophy. He is of the school of thought that you get what you can when you can because he says you can always replace it with better. I also consider him a bit of a hoarder.. so we kinda clash on our buying philosophy. He feels I keep waiting too long or don't indulge enough. I think he buys too quickly and unnecessarily.But also I should say, one of the reasons I am careful in my acquisitions is that in my experience if you get a crappy tool, most of the time one doesn't replace it. You make do with it and I find I end up annoyed that I have to deal with the crappy thing every time I use it, but still make do with it. So it's better not to be stuck with one that doesn't fit. What does all this have to do with lemon juicers, you probably wonder. Well, let me tell you why I am telling you all this. So this is what happened: I dropped my lemon juicer a few months ago and it broke, It was one of those traditional glass ones. I love those, so I was a bit gutted when it broke because it was nice and I used it quite often.Now this doesn't seem like a big deal, right? It's easy enough to replace. I thought so, too. Alas, I couldn't find any of them at the shops around here. They only had ugly plastic ones, which I refused to buy. I found myself using a fork as a squeezer for weeks (more like months actually). So Mr O told me to get an ugly plastic one.I refused. This went on for several more weeks. In my defence, the ugly ones weren't just not-pretty, but they looked unpractical and like they could break easily. I try to avoid plastics, so I think I was justified here.Then the citrus season came along. I usually make preserved lemons, mandarins and kumquats. This time, I kept postponing making my yearly batch. So we ran out of preserved lemons and I lamented the fact that I couldn't make more. Mr O was not very sympathetic to my dilemma. He told me, "just get the bloody juicer from the supermarket."I still refused.Then on one of my photo walks through Tahtekale I saw a shop that had kitchen supplies. And there was a juicer that cost approx. 50cents and seemed ok. Not exactly pretty, but sturdy. So I bought it. Kid you, not a few days later they had the glass ones in the supermarket. Here I was with my not quite perfect PLASTIC lemon juicer. I was not impressed. But now I had one, soooo... (I am stuck with it) I bet you are wondering why is she yapping on about juicers, who cares? And I admit you are right. What's the big deal? But see I have just renewed my intentions, I want to have less stuff not more and I wanna have a more sustainable household. I feel like we have somehow accumulated way too much stuff in our flat. A flat that's a bridge solution until with find a place we wanna settle, which means we going to have to move it all. This all meant that the ugly plastic juicer went against my intentions but so does buying a second glass one. The perfectionist overachiever in me just couldn't kinda let go of this. I was thinking about that this morning. And while I still think Mr O is too much of a consumer (and a bit of a hoarder) I also have to admit he doesn't get caught up in these kinds of dilemmas. He will just go more with the flow, just take what happens and run with it. I am pretty sure he doesn't waste much thought on what kind of a juicer one should possess nor does he much care about trivial things. What I am saying in a roundabout way is: I tend to get stuck on the goals and limits I set myself. And while grit is great, there is a fine line between being stubborn and having perseverance. I tend to get caught up in the small details because I want each detail to be perfect but we all know this is unachievable so I waste a massive amount of energy on inevitable things.While goals and intentions are really important, I think it is more important to keep moving rather than get stuck on details and to focus on the end goal & the journey. In the end, it's all about finding a good balance.As always I guess. Also, life is full of little reminders like lemon juicers... I was thinking about all of this, while I was juicing some pomegranates this morning. And I had two epiphanies: First: the not quite ugly plastic thing is actually pretty awesome and it doesn't only work for lemons but also as... Continue Reading →

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